Intangible Chemistry……..

With the passing of each day the more i feel  such an amazing connection and bond to Master, so amazing, intangible, unspoken. It is like a ball of energy in the center of my mind whirling around and heightening my senses, a bond filled with lust, mutual trust, for me now effortless communication with Him, such a deep respect and non- judgmental acceptance for her and for His guidance and the very feelings allow me to without even thinking open up myself to Him. His Mind, Sexual Energy, Lust Depravity surrounding me, consuming me. W/we share so many similarities sexually, mentally and emotionally that make me feel so comfortable and able to express my true self to Him and in return get the most amazing feeling of being understood and accepted. 

I have always pondered the concept of soulmates but never really truly believed it completely never being sure if I had ever truly felt the connection with anyone for sure. My interpretation of what feelings experienced between two people to feel so strongly connected to another they are your soul mate to me it is a  connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection becomes deeper over time, you experience an attraction and emotional attachment and sometimes love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved or cared for anyone prior. A soulmate truly accepts and  understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of belonging, comfort and happiness when you are around them. I do believe I have felt some of these connections with another that made me feel perhaps He was my soul mate but now there are no doubts in my mind what I thought might have been before with another was not even though a friendship that will last a lifetime it will never compare to the connection I now feel with my Master. I do believe in the BDSM dynamic we are sharing it allows me a real sense of safety and freedom to be me, no hiding or pretending that i am something i am not, that i can openly express and admit to Him things that I have never told another, at first my ability to share so freely with Him scared me not understanding but now i relish in it, it is like i am coming out of the closet on so many levels and the once stagnating feeling of fear is replaced with happiness and freedom.

Our differences in personalities and needs compliment each other perfectly. His discipline gives me an amazing feeling of safety that i had never had before and needed so much. A day ago something i refused to admit at any level in my life is that i feel weak in every way to Him and it felt so freeing to hear Him agree with me and tell me it is the way it should be. I can finally be me and ¬†not be concerned that i am weak, a freak or head case it is just me being me and being accepted 150%, life is wonderful and i have not felt so alive and free before. Thank You Daddy for this amazing ride You are taking me on, i am honored to be right behind You hanging on with every new journey You take me on…. ‚̧ putita¬†

One thought on “Intangible Chemistry……..

  1. I truly appreciate My lil brown beast sharing with Me…and others who read this…her true self…an all around weak lil beastie…minded minded, weak physically…weak EVERYTHING…compared to Me…that is the natural order of things…petting her. But it is here, W/we can begin. As she wrote in one of her other journal entries…that is not the end of the journey…but the start of one…patting her on the top of her head…good girl…

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